Zolof or excuse?

My youngest has shown stages of depression for some time, my husband and I fighting it naturally. Now, because she believes 18 means mom and dad are completely cut out of the equation, every small situation is an issue. A month ago, after her physician spoke to her, she came out and told him how she felt there were times she didn't want to live. He prescribed Zolof (and if the spelling is wrong, oh well, you know what I'm talking about). She has calmed down, not flying off in a rage as often, but . . . . Today, her boyfriend called me into the room to talk to me. She had told him she has thought about killing herself. It's been a little over a year since we conquered the "cutting." I also know, much of the problem also stems from her money she receives from SSI. Her father and I have came up against a problem stemming from lack of work (not being able to find a job). I informed her that I would need her next two checks to "keep" the house, that I would be missing a car payment, and asking the church for help to pay for the utilities and have food on the table. The fury began. I am being unfair. I'm using her. She doesn't understand that her father and I have received SSI for her since she has been six, this being part of our income for years. I truly want her to have "all her money," except what we agreed upon as rent after she turned 18. Although, she has never took her money to buy her "needs", which includes food. I understand her point, but she seems to think dad's SS is enough to pay for essential living, i.e, house, utilities, personal needs, food, and insurance, not including gas for a vehicle and the up keep of house and vehicle.

Sometimes I wonder if some of this stems from her boyfriend who has been out of work since March. I know he wants to take a trip to Chicago to visits friends before he goes into the service. The thing is, his leaving date isn't set yet--which needs a little explaining that I don't feel like going into here. her father and I have attempted to explain "a roof over your head, or living in the street (not exactly, but living with relatives, most likely her sister, who she doesn't want to be around right now). She doesn't realize the packing and moving that would have to be done, quickly, nor the amount of money to just move!

Anyhow, I don't know if her saying she feels like killing herself is due to the Zolof, which can cause this feeling, or the fact she thinks that her father and I are using her. She has refused to do chores, to do anything but sleep, watch movies, draw on the cement porch with chalk, and primp . . . and be ready for her boyfriend when he shows up.

Last night we had a blow out. I sat in my room crying, so angry with her for insinuating that I only want her money, and she insisting she doesn't have to do anything in this house if she doesn't want to because she is "18", and because I'm taking her money. She believes she can live on her small amount of money every month without working: rent, phone, utilities and food.

I think her father and I were weak on teaching her the meaning of responsibility, but how do you teach a child the meaning of money when he / she still cannot understand how to count it? Did we allow her disability to keep us from doing what we did with the others? Her math skills barely reach second grade level. Is her concept of money unrealistic? Is it our fault?

A part of me says "a little", while another part of me blames her in butting heads with me continuously in her lessens.

I can't write about this anymore without getting upset with the education system as much as with her and myself. I don't know what to do.